You have lost your heart, your money, and your dignity, but it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t your fault because you were manipulated and coerced, absolutely tricked into behaving in a certain way—a way that would serve your manipulator, not you.

What to Do If You’ve Been a Victim of a Romance Scam
We understand that falling victim to a romance scam can be an excruciatingly overwhelming experience, leaving you vulnerable and helpless. Here’s our step-by-step guide to navigate through this devastating experience:

Stop All Communication with the Scammer

• Cut Ties Immediately: Once you suspect you’ve been scammed, cease all contact with the scammer. Scammers may try to manipulate you further if you remain in contact. Your scammer managed to manipulate you until now and certainly will continue to do so. Don’t give your scammer another chance.
• Block Them: Block their phone number, email address, and social media accounts.

Gather Evidence and Contact Your Bank Immediately

• Document Everything: Save emails, text messages, transaction receipts, screenshots, and any other communication you had with the scammer. Do not delete any of the correspondence.
• Record Details: Write down everything you remember about the scam, including dates, amounts, and the scammer’s claims.
• Contact Your Bank: Let your bank know what has happened so that they can secure your accounts and prevent the scammer from taking or paying any further payments. You could also request a freeze on suspicious transactions.

Report the Scam
Reporting an online romance scammer can seem daunting, but it’s crucial for authorities to collect enough evidence to recognise the same criminal patterns and prevent these fraudsters from scamming others.

• Local Authorities: File a police report to document the incident officially.
• Fraud Reporting Agencies: Contact agencies like the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission (ACCC) in Australia, Action Fraud in the UK or the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) in the US.
• Online Platforms: Report the scammer’s account to the platform where you met them (e.g., social media or dating apps). See our guide below.

Note: Please check our ‘Where to Report’ page for country-specific guidelines and further information.

Protect Your Identity and Secure Your Financial Accounts
If you shared sensitive, personal information with your scammer or downloaded spyware onto your device, please take these precautions:

• Remove Spyware from Your Devices Immediately: If your scammer asked you to download spyware onto your devices, such as your computer or phone, remove the spyware immediately and let your bank know. The most common remote access apps are: LogMeIn, TeamViewer and AnyDesk.
• Freeze Your Credit: Contact credit bureaus to freeze your credit, which will prevent new accounts from being opened in your name.
• Use Identity Monitoring Services: Sign up for services alerting you to suspicious identity-related activity.
• Watch for Signs of Identity Theft: Look out for unexpected bills, unfamiliar accounts, or notifications about credit inquiries.
• Change Passwords: Update passwords for your online banking and payment accounts immediately.
• Monitor Statements: Review your bank and credit card statements regularly for unauthorised transactions.

Be Aware of Follow-Up or Recovery Scams
Follow-up or recovery scams are the next level of fraud after the initial scam. They may be immediate attempts or happen years later. Please educate yourself about follow-up or recovery scams and their warning signs. For further information, check our ‘Recovery Scams’ page.

Get Support & Psychological Help
Being scammed DOES have a profound emotional toll on its victims. To address the psychological impact, it’s essential to:

• Talk to Someone You Trust: Share your experience with a close friend or family member.
• Join Support Groups: Many communities and online forums exist to support scam victims.
• Consider Professional Help: Therapy or counselling can help you process feelings of shame, loss, anger, or guilt and perhaps prevent depression in the future.